First of two reviews on beer consumed by a newly crowned, gluten-free beer snob.
I feel that I’m going to need to address two subjects in this review of the New Planet Off Grid Pale Ale. Subject 1: Why am I becoming a “gluten-free beer snob?” Subject 2: Why is a beer that I call “awful” getting a low, but passing, grade?
Subject 1 is pretty simple, really. A couple trips to the Minute Clinic, then the doctor, then the acupuncturist…lo and behold, I may have gluten intolerance. So, doctors’ orders, down with all gluten.
This may impact my work here on the Metasip site.
Most of my favorite beers have some of the gluten. Darnit! Gonna have to do quite a bit of trial-and-error. (You can recommend cider if you’d like – not sure it’s really my thing yet. For some, though, cider can be really hip.
Subject 2: Grading on a curve, or not. Our theory at HQ is this: if it’s in a store, it has passed some series of tests. Some distributor finds it worthy enough to get it into a store near us, and, therefore, it HAS to be passable. I’m not going to give something an “F,” nor will I plan to go into the “D” range very often. “C-,” for now, is going to be the lowest grade. Bringing us to the review…
If “sorghum” and “brown rice” are your thing, I’m going to recommend you stay away from beer and go find a vegan restaurant that will fry up a little of both with some garlic and shallots. Neither belong in beer.
Aftertaste like a bad shopping mall Chinese restaurant buffet.
I think it said 5% ABV. Frankly, I don’t want to pull the bottle out of recycling to find out.
I once read a column from the legendary movie reviewer Gene Siskel who said something along the lines of “if the movie is bad, walk out. Your time is more valuable.” So the price – $7.99 – is irrelevant; three sips, followed by mouthwash, and I had to move on to something else.
Metasip Grade: C-
We’ll find “Beer” not “Beer…that isn’t bad for gluten-free.” This doesn’t even qualify as the latter.